Stoicism · The Stoic Way, part 13 of 20 · 4 October 2026 · Charlotte Himsworth
Taking Our Power Back
Living without the filter of a victim, with honesty and care.
There is a quiet difference between having been hurt and living as though we will always be defined by that hurt. Stoicism speaks directly to that difference.
Harm is real
Let us be clear first. When someone wrongs us, the wrong is theirs. Naming it honestly, seeking help, and protecting ourselves are signs of strength, not weakness. Stoicism never asks us to pretend that injustice is acceptable.
Not the end of the story
What Stoicism adds is this: what happened to us does not get to write the rest of our story. Our judgements, our choices and our next steps remain ours. We can stop replaying the injury as the centre of our lives, and begin to build around it.
Handing back the keys
Often, without meaning to, we hand the keys of our peace to people who cannot hold them: those who hurt us, those who disapprove of us, events we cannot change. Taking our power back means gently taking those keys home.
Like the promontory
Marcus Aurelius offered an image: “Be like the promontory against which the waves continually break, but it stands firm and tames the fury of the water around it.” The waves still come. The rock does not have to be swept away.
Gently, and with support
This is not something to rush or to do alone. Healing takes time, and the support of kind people and, where needed, professionals. Stoicism is a companion on that path, not a replacement for it.
A simple practice
Finish this sentence in your journal: “What happened was not my choice. What I choose now is…” Write one small, kind step you can take for yourself today.
If you are struggling with despair, you deserve real support, not only philosophy. Please speak to your GP, or call Samaritans on 116 123, any time, day or night.